There are just some nights that a person doesn’t sleep well. I’ve discovered as I get older that it happens with more regularity. As do the aches that are sometimes the culprit in the difficulty in sleeping. So, God and I have some interesting conversations at odd hours of the night and early morning.
On one such early morning, as often happens, I turned on the Bible app on the phone and listened. I love listening to the Word of God, it is often richer and more powerful for me that way. Things I know I’ve read before somehow, suddenly, are like something new and fresh. The fun thing about times like those is that I hear exactly what I need to hear. An emotion, a concern, perhaps even a fear that was just under the surface is revealed and God gives me the answer I need in those beautiful words.
Sometimes, when listening to one or both of the letters to Timothy, I have thought “this doesn’t apply to me”. I’m not a preacher, I’m not a man. Then the depth of the messages in the words speaks volumes. Not only to the young preacher Timothy, but to this not so young woman who, like all believers, is a minister to all she meets. And I rejoice. I am comforted. I find peace, and yes, I return to sleep.
God’s love encompasses every inch of who we are, and what we need as His children. Reach out to Him, trust that He is waiting and more than willing to reach a hand back to you.
I thank God whom I serve, as did my ancestors, with a clear conscience, as I remember you constantly in my prayers night and day. As I remember your tears, I long to see you, that I may be filled with joy. I am reminded of your sincere faith, a faith that dwelt first in your grandmother Lois and your mother Eunice and now, I am sure, dwells in you as well. For this reason I remind you to fan into flame the gift of God, which is in you through the laying on of my hands, for God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control.
Therefore do not be ashamed of the testimony about our Lord, nor of me his prisoner, but share in suffering for the gospel by the power of God, who saved us and called us to a holy calling, not because of our works but because of his own purpose and grace, which he gave us in Christ Jesus before the ages began, and which now has been manifested through the appearing of our Savior Christ Jesus, who abolished death and brought life and immortality to light through the gospel, for which I was appointed a preacher and apostle and teacher, which is why I suffer as I do. But I am not ashamed, for I know whom I have believed, and I am convinced that he is able to guard until that day what has been entrusted to me. Follow the pattern of the sound words that you have heard from me, in the faith and love that are in Christ Jesus. By the Holy Spirit who dwells within us, guard the good deposit entrusted to you. – 2 Timothy 1:3-14 (ESV)